Changing it up

While I do not believe in resolutions pertaining to a new year I do believe that it is refreshing to start a new year, if the previous year was not the best. Resolutions to do with personal growth should be a year round thing, and I do not buy into anything that was written or passed down by man. 

Having said that I feel 2007 was a year of being stalled, and I am not sure 2008 will be any different. I do not buy into the hype of the laws of attraction, trust me I have a good attitude for the most part and have faith and pride in my abilities and talent. Some say I am arrogant and I am convinced I am a snob, willing and piling this positive attitude bullshit on my subconscious, yet the world still seems stalled and me stalled with it.

There have been some positive things, of course, we always dwell on the negative, making them larger than life, overwhelming our world. Truth is for most people life is up and down, good and bad, positive and negative, and more importantly filled with constant change. It is this inability to deal with change that causes most of the stress in our minds.

Having a good attitude sometimes changes very little in ones heart. I have felt heartbroken and a sense of loss the past year, when the reasoning behind it lacked logic. I have felt down and an increasing need for solitude, when by nature I am outgoing. I found I lost my faith in things around me, and this is a bad place to be. So the year ending to me meant leaving all that baggage behind and finding my Libra balance again.

So in the name of mental health and much needed balance, in 2008, I will have a better job, more money, less debt, a bit of romance, or a lot of romance, more intimacy than I can stand to make up for lost time. I will surround myself with people who are not afraid to say what they feel, who in turn will bring out the best in me, people who want to be better themselves. I will be thin and healthy and sexy. I will think less about aging and more about growing, and I will distance myself from unhealthy people and things. I will write until I cry, paint all the pictures and movement trapped inside me, draw and create and be wild and adventurous. I will be a roller derby queen and make new friends, get in great shape, will have to beat men off with a stick. Groupies perhaps? If I want 3 more tattoos I will get them. I will be a great friend and an even better sister. And more importantly I will live each day aware of how precious this life is.

No more grief.