Questions to Women

* I want to understand why the need for the wedding complete with the expensive dress, the china, the debt and the drama. Do we ever stop and ask “why” and “how” these traditions started? We live our lives like sheep, doing what is expected of us, especially as women. Why are we living our lives waiting for “true love” or someone to complete us? Have you seen what weddings do to people? Have you seen what marriage does to women? I am not saying every union is doomed or irrelevant to ones’ life. I am saying that men and women do NOT think the same and the second you marry a man he sees the home as your area as expertise and the “real” world as his area of expertise. We get men second hand, hot off the MOMMY press. Yes even we feminist mothers waited on our sons. So my question is this. Why not break the cycle? We enable men by becoming the very women we swore we would not. If the ripple effect is no more marriage why not. I could live in a world where we had our meaningful time together, procreated, helped raise our children and lived totally independent of each other.

* Why do you let men control the outcome? I understand, not your man!! No, he is fair and nice and even washes the dishes. Well good for you. Step aside and let me address the remaining 99% of women out there. If you are in a controlling relationship here are the clues:
-he hates your friends
-he hates your family
-he is jealous of any time you spend away from him, even if it is a course at school
-he accuses you of cheating and makes up stories like “my friend saw you” and so on.
I have been in these relationships, they adore you at first. Every nuance, every eccentricity, every cute bumbling gesture. They want to shrink you and keep you in their pocket to have you near them. The control is gradual. I had a five year relationship with a man, my longest to date, which is really a testament to my preference to live alone. This man, in the end, had me convinced I was a liar and cheat and I found myself defending his ridiculous accusations in a way that was laced with guilt where there was none. He hated anyone I was close to, would create drama to keep me from going out with my friends and made up stories about my so called clandestine behavior. Needless to say this ended violently, and to this day, twenty years later, this man still hates me and has never taken responsibility for his actions.

* Why do you dumb it down to get a man? Date men beneath you? Date just to not be alone? You deserve every single thing you want and desire….just like they do. If they all think they deserve a model that is a slut in bed and keeps the house clean hold out for the same if you desire. Men are not the ones calling the shots, they just THINK they are.

When a man disrespects you, talks down to you, patronizes you or cheats on you end it, stop being a door mat. This goes for all men, not just your mates or potential mates.

Stand up for other women. If you see the pot bellied fifty year old staring at the teenager’s ass and tits say something, scare him into reality, do you really want to know why they continue to behave this way? Because they can. Be disgusted, often they deserve it. Watch the news, be aware, care about your fellow sister.

If you have a good man, a fair man, a man who is not ruled by ego or his penis, good for you, have him spread the word, the days where women are subjugated by men are over.