~The Mask~

"Sarah King? Is there a Mrs. King available?" The nurse asked, looking around the chattering hospital ward, while checking her clipboard.

"Yes… that’s me," Sarah said, quietly. She looks tired to the nurse and has black pouches under her eyes.

"Dr. Schwartz is waiting for you."

The two ladies walked down the fluorescent lit hallway. "My apologies," the nurse said. "Today is my first week here and I’m trying to work on getting to know this place still."

"That’s fine. I won’t be here much longer," Sarah said, following slowly behind the nurse and studying the piece of paper clutched in her fist.

"Go ahead in," the nurse said softly.

Dr. Schwartz’s office was bright with pale afternoon sunlight and full of potted plants. He sat peacefully behind his desk with his hands resting on the top of his stomach bulge.

"And how is Sarah today?" He said, reaching for the dish of peanuts, offering hope and comfort. "Help yourself to a chair."

"Thanks," Sarah said, quietly. "I miss home," she continues talking and shyly reaches for the closest chair to take her seat. "I brought a poem to show you… I’m planning on giving it to my daughter, Darleen." Sarah pulls her arm out in front of her and passes the crumpled piece of paper to the doctor.

Dr. Schwartz smoothed the paper out on his desk and began to read to himself:

The Mask

It happened long ago in my past.

I started to wear a little mask.

My mask helped me survive the day.

People loved the face of the mask, I would say.

It kept me safe and strong;

But every time I took it off, I knew I was wrong.

I didn’t like the little face of pain and fear.

So, the mask went on to cover the tears.

Love Mom

He looked up at Sarah. The sun was glowing on her face, but her boney structure and pale skin didn’t notice the warmth.

"I want to go home Doctor Schwartz," she said. "I need to get out of this fucking place. I’m not crazy," Sarah shouted. The birds flew off of the office window sill into the trees.

"I know Sarah, but we just started the process of things with you," Dr. Schwartz said, catching her attention away from the flying birds. "You signed yourself in here, but you can’t leave. Not until I believe you are truly better."

"I’m not going to start taking those damn pills, if that’s what it takes to get out of here, Doctor Schwartz," Sarah screamed, snatching up the poem on the doctor’s desk. "My daughter’s coming in a few days. Do you think she wants to see her mother all messed up on drugs? I won’t do it."

"Okay, that will be it for today," Dr. Schwartz replied. "Nurse?"

Sarah left the doctor’s office slamming the door behind her and headed back to room on the eighth floor. While walking, she began crying. Thoughts of her husband came into mind.

"Why did I leave Gary? He probably thinks I’m crazy."She thought to herself.

Walking into her room, Sarah noticed a vase of daisies sitting on the table.

"What’s this all about Maggie?" Sarah asked her roommate, reaching for the card.

"The nurse brought them in for you," Maggie said. "I wish someone brought me some flowers. It’s really not fair. They shouldn’t be able to bring flowers up here like that. Making other people feel jealous and not loved."

Sarah ignored Maggie’s comments and began reading the card.

Love is forgiving

Even though it is hard to forget

Holding hands and never wanting to let go

Hoping that tomorrow will be better than today.

Thinking of you always,

Darleen

Sarah placed the card down and looked up at Maggie.

"They’re from my daughter," Sarah said.

Maggie was an older lady who had been staying at the hospital off and on for the past two years. She left her husband too, but before her nervous breakdown and after having taken the doctor’s medication she has been too neurotic to leave.

The telephone rings.

"Hello?" Sarah asked.

"Hi mother. How are you feeling?" Darleen asked.

"I’m fine honey," Sarah cried. "I love the flowers."

"Mother, don’t cry. I’m coming to see you soon," Darleen said.

"I’ve never had anyone buy me flowers before," Sarah continued.

"Mother, I can’t talk long, but I’ll see you soon," Darleen said. "I promise."

"Yes, come soon. I’m ready to come home," Sarah said.

"We’ll talk soon, Mom. I love you," Darleen said.

"I love you," Sarah put the phone down. She sat down on her bed and read the poem again and again.

She read the line, "People would love the face of the mask I would say."

Sarah’s throat began to fill up with vomit. She ran to the bathroom. After throwing up, Sarah laid her head down on the toilet seat and began crying. She sat up and began pounding her head into the bathroom mirror.

"I’m never going to leave this place," Sarah yelled out.

A nurse ran into the room.

"Bring the doctor," the nurse shouted into the hallway.

Moments later, two male nurses walked into the room with Doctor Schwartz. He pulled a

needle out from his cloak and stuck it into Sarah’s bottom.

"All better," Dr. Schwartz said.

Sarah fell asleep and the two male nurses put her to bed.

Two days later…

"Mother? Mother? Can you hear me?" Darleen asked, rubbing Sarah’s hand.

Darleen noticed a crumpled up piece paper beside her hip and tossed it in the garbage. She looked at her mother. Sarah’s eyes were stone cold open, but she wasn’t replying.

"What’s wrong with her," Darleen asked the nurse.

"She hasn’t been feeling well lately. We gave her some medication," the nurse replied. "I’ll leave you with her now."

~ The Journals of D~

If you have comments about this article please email us @ comments@shebytches.com. We will post them on the right. Dawn can be contacted at dawn@shebytches.com