Keeping a Friendship

There has been a topic floating around me a lot lately.  I know people talk about this, but it’s stuck in my head; so free it shall be.  The topic of being only friends with an ex boyfriend or girlfriend seems to be what I’ve been stirring up lately in my little world.  I strongly believe you can remain only friends with an ex, but not everyone seems to think so.

In my world, I'm a friend for the most part, with my exs. They are not my exs anymore; they are my friends. They are friendships that can only be friendships and nothing more and we figured that out through trial and error of dating. No hard feelings. Why don't people understand this? Is it that hard of a concept to wrap your head around?

I understand for some people it is extremely difficult to just be friends with an ex sometimes, because there are such intense feelings and it does suck that the other doesn't feel that way anymore (or has done something unforgivable). But, why lose the underlying friendship that was developed. Of course there are some people you just can't stay friends with after a relationship. Just like sometimes you have friends that you can't stay friends with. And, you can’t be friends with everyone in the general population either. That's life.

I just wish the people who choose to believe that people who’ve dated can’t be friends would not attack or hold it against the ones who can maintain this ability.  It is unfortunate that in this modern day world some can be so close-minded about the topic.  These people could be missing out on great opportunities of friendships; after all there was that initial draw to one another.  I would never tell someone how to think, feel or behave about this issue (or any).  I always offer my opinion only in hopes that my view can be seen, understood and respected from their standpoint.

It is likely I will not change how I feel about this.  After all I am living proof that it is a natural, easy and possible option for relationships that can no longer be romantic.  I am always open to hearing how others feel about this.  I’ve also been in relationships with people who don’t share my view.  That can be rather frustrating.  I often wonder if it is mistrust of a past relationship that has helped form this notion in their head; and if so, why is it taken out on me?  I cannot give up my friends because of their own insecurities. Why should I?  Everyone has the right to choose whom they want to be friends with.  I’m a grown independent woman, who has always made her own decisions.  I wish that people would stop trying to push their silly ideals down MY throat!